It’s no secret that I was overweight growing up. I went through the phases most kids go through – lean during some months/years and more ‘filled out’ during others, but if you line up photos of me from age 1 to age 15 you’ll see a steady upward climb toward obesity. I think my family was disappointed that I ended up fat, but given the size of pretty much every member of my family (immediate and distant), it probably would have more surprising if I had ended up thin – sad but true. More sadly still, most kids today will probably end up in the same position as 18 year-old me, given the skyrocketing obesity rates in the western world.

I’m going to check my modesty for a minute and say that losing 100lbs is probably the thing that I’m most proud of in my life. To say that my weight loss took dedication, courage, willpower and strength would be an understatement. I’m so so grateful for being at a healthy weight today, but I truly wouldn’t be the person I am today if I hadn’t lived most of my life as an overweight/obese person. In the spirit of embracing where I came from, I thought I would step back into my old self and talk a bit about the five things I wish someone had told me about weight loss before I embarked on this journey – both good and bad.

1. Your Body Has A Memory

Sometimes I look in the mirror and think “Dang! Look at those muscles. ” Other times – maybe it’s in yoga class, maybe it’s when I’m reaching for something, or maybe it’s while I’m running – I’ll catch a glimpse of the excess skin on my triceps, stomach or thighs and I’m knocked down a few pegs. I’d like to say that I see these remnants as symbols of my weight loss journey and that they remind me of how far I’ve come – but I would be lying. Forgive me for being dramatic, but I hate my excess skin and it breaks my heart a little every time I see someone running in shorts and realize my legs will never look like that. Admittedly, it could be a lot worse, but still.

2. You’ll Still Feel Like A Fat Kid Sometimes

When I was overweight, I remember looking around one of my classes and realizing that I was the fattest person in the room. The truth is, sometimes you’ll forget that you’ve lost weight and you’ll still look around the room when you’re in a meeting or at a party and wonder if you’re the biggest person there. I’m pretty sure that with time this will fade, but I’m three years out from my weight loss and it still feels fresh to me.

3. You Might Feel Worse Sometimes…

I came to the realization about a year ago that avoid parties, bars and clubs more now that I’m thin than I did when I was overweight and obese. For the life of me, I could understand why – I mean now that I’m a “normal” size shouldn’t I want to flaunt it in cute outfits and go out as much as possible?

And then it hit me: now that I’m an ‘average’ size (and not plus size), I’m in competition. When I was big, I just assumed no one was paying attention to me so, although I felt unattractive when I went out, I didn’t feel like I didn’t measure up to the thin girls because I didn’t even consider myself to be in the same category. Now, every time I go out, I feel like I’m being measured against the other girls. Given the issues described in #1 (Your Body Has A Memory), this is very difficult for me to deal with. Forgive my terrible attitude, but I guess I feel like I’d rather not compete than compete and lose I’m working on this, I swear!

4. But Life IS Better

I’ve read my fair share of weight loss articles online, on blogs, and in magazines over the years and the resounding adage seems to be that being skinny won’t make your life better. I disagree wholeheartedly. When I was overweight, waking up and getting dressed every day was the bane of my existence. I dreaded picking out and outfit like some people dread going to the dentist. Of course I still have [many] days where I feel bloated and puffy and heavy, but I have go-to outfits that I know that I look objectively good in. I never felt like this was the case when I was fat.

Aside from the physical, losing 100lbs has also improved my self-worth and increased my self-esteem across the board. I know that if I was capable of losing 100lbs without a crazy diet or ever seeing a personal trainer, I can do just about anything. The weight-loss and maintenance process taught me more about myself than any other experience has.

5. The Novelty Will Wear Off

When I first lost weight, I couldn’t go anywhere without people commenting on how great I looked. The community of friends, acquaintances and coworkers I had built in Ottawa had only ever known me as fat, so when people saw that I’d lost weight, they were amazed and generally had infectious enthusiasm. In the moment, I hated the attention that losing weight got me and dreaded answering questions about it, but now that the novelty has worn off, I miss it. When I meet new people nowadays, they meet and get to know me as “Thin Danielle”; for most of the idea that I was 100 pounds heavier at one point is absurd.

So bear in mind as you lose weight that eventually, people will stop noticing and the continuation or maintenance of your weight-loss will need to come 100% from within. You’ll need to dig in and find some intrinsic motivation to carry out the process even when the thin you becomes the “normal” you. If you can carry on despite no one noticing, though, I think you’ll learn an incredible amount about yourself and what drives you.

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So that’s it – 5 things I wish someone had told me about weight loss. I hope it wasn’t too much of a downer, and that it was helpful to you in some way. Even though the things I pointed out were mostly negative, please know that if you’re obese and trying to reach a healthy weight, the process and even the ‘negative’ side effects are so so SO worth it.

Have you lost weight? I’d love to hear about your ‘discoveries’ about weight loss!

Ladies and Gentlemen…

Wear sunscreen. If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long term
benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis or
reliable then my own meandering experience.  I will dispense this advice….now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, nevermind, you won’t understand the power and
beauty of your youth until they’ve faded, but trust me in 20 years, you’ll look back at photos of
yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous
you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don’t worry about the future, or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra
equation by chewing bubblegum.

The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind: the kind that blindsides
you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts; don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don’t waste your time on jealousy.  Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind.  The race is
long, and in the end, it’s only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive; forget the insults. (if you succeed in doing this, tell me how).

Keep your old love letters; throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life.  The most interesting people
I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives; some of the most interesting 40 year
olds I know still don’t.

Get plenty of Calcium.  Be kind to your knees — you’ll miss them when they’re gone.

Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t.  Maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t.  Maybe you’ll
divorce at 40; maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary.

Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself, either.  Your choices are half
chance, so are everybody else’s.

Enjoy your body: use it every way you can.  Don’t be afraid of it or what other people think of it; it’s the
greatest instrument you’ll ever own.

Dance…even if you have no where to do it but in your own living room.

Read the directions (even if you don’t follow them).

Do not read beauty magazines; they will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents; you never know when they’ll be gone for good.

Be nice to your siblings: they’re your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in
the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but what a precious few should hold on.  Work hard to bridge the gaps
and geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you
were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard.

Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old; and when you
do, you’ll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children
respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don’t expect anyone else to support you.  Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you’ll have a wealthy spouse,
but you never know when either one might run out.

Don’t mess too much with your hair or by the time you are 40, it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it.  Advice is a form of nostalgia;
dispensing it is a way of wishing the past from the disposal–wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts, and
recycling it for more than it’s worth.

But trust me, I’m the sunscreen.

- Everybody’s Free (To Wear Sunscreen) – Baz Luhrmann